Enjoy motherhood while it lasts. I mean it, really!!
I know this must sound crazy as your kid is throwing a tantrum. I understand it must sound even crazier when your child has spilled food onto your just cleaned rug. I even know that it would sound impossible when all you want is just few moments of peace by yourself.
Been there, done that. I have been through all the challenges of accepting motherhood. There were days when all I thought was when my kids would grow up and fly the nest. It was very challenging to accept being a mom all the time let alone enjoy motherhood.
My elder two kids are just 18 months apart. It was a really a tough time for me when they were growing up. It was very difficult to think straight when I was changing the nappy of the baby while the toddler needed the attention. I was totally at my wits end and really wonder how I survived that phase.
But when my third one was born it was an even challenge. Taking care of her while I had two school going kids was pretty taxing. Add health issues to it, and it was a perfect recipe for disaster.
But still I would say that I enjoyed her childhood the best. It was something that I read on the Internet that changed my perspective completely. It was a heartfelt poem by Erma Bombeck. It was like turning the key in my heart. The words hit me so hard that it took me a long time to recover from the emotions thereafter. Tears were flowing down my cheek and all the reality hit me so hard. I realized that the very same things that were annoying me so badly will be missed.
The things that we so take for granted will last no longer. It was this realization that makes me enjoy motherhood to the fullest. I know they will never be the same age ever again. They are never going to turn back to a toddler. They will never be a baby again. The time once lost is gone forever.
Right now I can’t even imagine my life without my kids. Being all alone, having nothing to do sometimes look very so scary to me. Though it sounds so amazing to have all the time by yourself doing the stuff that I love. Being able to do the things that I am passionate about without feeling guilty, sounds so amazing but in reality will it be the same? Will I actually be happy without my kids around??
When the time comes when I will eventually have to let go of my kids will I be prepared for it??
Kids grow sooner than we realize. It just looks like yesterday that my eldest daughter was born. It seems that time has suddenly taken wings.
I can’t even believe that my youngest is already going to school. Kids grow sooner than we think they will. They grow up into a rebellious teenager while all we remember is that they are still babies. Sometimes when I look back I’m just amazed how how my little baby has already reached teenage. When she is being her typical teenage rebellious self I am dumbfounded that this is the very girl that was in my arms cuddling just a few years back.
It’s about time that we celebrate each and every day of their childhood while it lasts. We will never be able to turn back time and get these precious moments back. There is no way that we will be able to bring back even a single day of their life after they have flown the nest.
Once they start their own families, their own life, there is no way that we will be able to enjoy them. And as hard as it sounds, we will no longer be an important part of their world. They will have their own priorities, their own list of things to do. We will no longer mean the world to them. When I realized that this will be become true sooner than I know, I just started to enjoy motherhood. There is no way I’m going to whine and lament that I don’t have a breather. It was just a sudden realization, a sudden emotion, a sudden feeling.
My things and my hobbies can wait until my kids grow up. I can always pick up my things and my hobbies after they have left the nest. But I would never be able to bring back the memories and the moments that I spend with them today.
If that means that I have to sacrifice my paintings for soccer practice then gladly I will.
So these were my words for today that I wanted to share with you all. I do not have any special tips or tricks to enjoy motherhood. Just few heartfelt words. Enjoy your kids while you are the world to them. Enjoy your motherhood while they are the world to you. Enjoy your motherhood while it lasts. I leave you all with the poem by Erma Bombeck.
“OK. One of these days you’ll explode and shout to the kids, “Why don’t you grow up and act your age?” …and they will.
“You guys get outside and find yourselves something to do. And don’t slam the door!” ……and they don’t.
You’ll straighten up the boys’ bedroom neat and tidy — bumper stickers discarded, bedspread tucked and smooth, toys displayed on the shelves. Hangers in the closet. Animals caged. And you’ll say out loud, “Now I want it to stay this way.”…and it will.
You’ll prepare a perfect dinner with a salad that hasn’t been picked to death and a cake with no finger traces in the icing, and you’ll say, “Now, there’s a meal for company.” …and you’ll eat it alone.
You’ll say: “I want complete privacy on the phone. No dancing around. No demolition crews. Silence! Do your hear?”…and you’ll have it.
No more plastic tablecloths stained with spaghtetti.
No more bedspreads to protect the sofa from damp bottoms.
No more gates to stumble over at the top of the basement steps.
No more clothespins under the sofa.
No more playpens to arrange a room around.
No more anxious nights under a vaporizer tent
No more sand on the sheets or Popeye movies in the bathrooms.
No more iron-on-patches, wet, knotted shoestrings, tight boots, or rubber bands for ponytails. Imagine. A lipstick with a point on it.
No baby sitter for New Year’s Eve.
Washing only once a week.
Seeing a steak that isn’t ground.
Having your teeth cleaned without a baby on your lap.
No PTA meetings. No car pools. No blaring radios. No one washing her hair at 11 o’clock at night. Having your own roll of Scotch tape.
Think about it. No more Christmas presents out of toothpicks and library paste. No more sloppy oatmeal kisses. No more tooth fairy. No giggles in the dark. No knees to heal, no responsibility.
Only a voice crying, “Why don’t you grow up?” and the silence echoing,
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Until next time,